Lauren Rebstock

Life in Brazil: Part 2 “Rugaroo”

Location : Rio De Janeiro, Brazil

And just like that I have Brazil life: part 2. So just to let you all know this is a progressive story of approximately 8-10 months, and its a bit graphic. Also I almost peed my pants several times just trying to put this into words and a cohesive story. Here it is, I brought sully to Brazil in July and immediately started potty training. He’s the smartest dog in the world so naturally he caught on pretty quickly. Duh. Night after night before bed we would go outside and hang out so he could get his business done. In the beginning especially, we were out there 5-6 times a night, at all hours, sometimes just to hang out, no business getting done. Boy did he have me on a schedule. Sammy at some point started sharing this responsibility with me which was awesome because A.) most days all the eye cream and concealer in brazil couldn’t hide my dark circles from not getting much sleep and B.) from the get Sammy told me I was a single parent with Sully, he never wanted a dog, he just wanted me to be happy. On a side note, this is both ridiculous and sweet. Now, you can all to take a moment to view our social medias and check out how wrapped around Sully’s little paw Sammy truly is. He’s a great fur dad. Okay, back to my story, I can’t get too side tracked because this is serious.

So where was I? Oh yes, Sammy waking up at 3am with Sully to look at the stars.(hahaha) So as the story was first told to me, they both walked downstairs half asleep, turned on the outside light and before they could open the door, heard movement in the backyard and then saw something dart through the darkness. Now if this was me, I can’t even begin to explain the national crisis Sammy would have had on his hands. So we will stick to Sammy and how he handled this situation. Now Sully lost his mind and was out the door in a flash (yes he can open the door himself, smartest dog ever remember?!) Sammy caught a glance of what appeared to be a cat or pig or some rugaroo creature lurking around our back porch. Said creature proceeded to scurry away, but not before Sully being the brave and curious dog he is, chased it into this bird sanctuary thing we have in our yard. Honestly the bird sanctuary is really random, it has a papaya tree and this strange hut in it. Who knows? Brazil. But it has two entry way gates and it blocked off from the rest of the yard. Somehow this creature got into the giant random cage and disappeared. At this point, Sammy is yelling at Sully and still trying to find a stick to help Sul get that intruder. I believe it ended up being a rake that I caught sight of him with once I finally got downstairs to check out what the commotion was. He was frazzled, but ready to protect Sully which was adorable. Ladies, nothing says your man is a hero quite like him standing there in his boxers at 3 in the morning, holding a rake, exasperated after chasing and trying to get the dog inside the house.

Next day, I pull “Lemoncello” aside and tell him we need a big trap because there is a large, unnamed, unidentified creature in the yard that can potentially hurt Sully and we gotta take care of that shit, like yesterday. Well this was said mostly through sign language, broken Portuguese /English and some google translate. None of which was really accurate or explanatory because he looked at me with a blank face and just walked away. Later I had someone translate to him. Months ago this was far more effective, as I hope you all remember the garden story. Now two days post sighting, “Lemon” puts out some “Cachach” (which is the local moonshine) to lure the dreaded creature to the backyard, get it drunk and slow, in order to bash it on the head and relocate it anywhere but here in our yard. No lie. This happened. Needless to say this tactic did not work. Apparently this thing had a high alcohol tolerance. Maybe the neighbors were also having sighting in their yards and giving him a little moonshine too. Who knows. “Lemon” does however give the creature a name afterwards. Gamba. Just the word is terrifying. I’d prefer Rugaroo, but this is a true story so we will stick with the facts.

I have done zero research on what this nuisance actually is, but I do know its an ugly little thing that I’d rather never see again. Time went on and the “gamba” was not sighted again for some months. Until just this past weekend.So to bring you all up to speed on my perfect pooch, we have gotten to the point where Sully only goes outside right before bed, and then every once in awhile in the wee morning hours and then around the time we wake to get our day started. This is relevant in this story because Sully, a fire, Beyonce’s twins being born or a midnight snack craving, are the only reasons I’d ever get my ass out of bed at some wee hour. Make no mistake about that.

Picture this, it is Saturday night, we are headed to bed after a leisurely night at home. We watched an amazing movie (Hidden Figures, check it out), we had wine, and it was wrapping up to be pretty perfect evening for us. Sometimes I like to mess with Sammy and make him take Sully out before bed, for many reasons, 1. Sully sometimes doesn’t do business and your just standing outside like a jackass for 25 minutes watching him pace and smell the yard in your pj’s , 2. it takes me longer to get ready for bed with all the skin regimen and brushing teeth etc., 3. Because all i heard for months before Sully came along was “no you are not getting a dog” & then “you will be a single fur-parent”, 4. Because I get a kick out of racing up the stairs and saying “You’re It”, especially after wine and we are both tired. Sidenote: Thank God Sammy puts up with my shenanigans. (Squirrel)

Alright, he takes Sully out, I’m upstairs brushing my teeth, having a little laugh to myself about all the above. When I hear both Sully and Sammy going bananas. Sully is of course losing his mind barking up a storm, Sammy is yelling at Sully and for me. Bless his heart. I knew it. The Gamba had returned. (Da dun dunnnnnnnnn.) I opened our balcony door, which overlooks the back yard, toothbrush in mouth, a bit wine tipsy, to find both my boys running in circles frantically chasing the gamba aka “G-rat” aka making my husband a nervous wreck. I threw down the toothbrush like I was on a mission, which later I wasn’t sure why this happened, and ran down the stairs, in my pjs with socks (lots of sliding). Hope you can really get a picture here of this fiasco. Lets just say curse words were flying and then Sammy found some stick, and Sully had chased the large creature up a tree. We are turning on all the outside lights from our carport and the soccer field and trying to get a hold of Sully, which wasn’t working because he too was on a mission. Give or take 20 minutes later we could finally go inside because the Gamba had escaped and Sully had calmed down. My poor husband on the other hand was again frazzled and swearing to never take Sully out to potty again. Now the thing is, before I actually opened that sliding door to go outside, I stood there witnessing the chaos that had ensued and had myself a good laugh. This whole scene was hilarious and I still swear if a camera crew followed us around we would have a hit reality TV show.

Monday rolls around and I once again get with “Lemon” to figure out the Gamba situation. He gives me several reasons why I shouldn’t worry about the Gamba hurting Sully, several tactics on how to chase the Gamba away, and lastly tells me the Gamba is an endangered species and he won’t be trying to catch our kill it, but he will keep the stick near the backdoor for me. I almost lost it when the last part came out.

So there you have it, Part 2 Living in Brazil. Hope you enjoy.

Leave me some feedback and any suggestions for future blogs.

Love you all

Lu

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